What a day at Vintage Double Hose is like

[Bryan]

[video]https://youtu.be/1jtbwac0WqQ[/video]

[swimjim]

Yep, that is what a one man business is like. Well, it doesn't show the long hours and lost weekends. LOL. As an example, I get static from people because I am only on job sites from about 8:30 to 3:00. Well, that doesn't count the paper work I'm doing in my bathrobe at 5:30 am. Or loading the van at 7:00 On the phone with suppliers at 8:00, out for estimates from 4:00 to 6:00. On the phone with customers from 4:00 till 8:00. The fun never stops. But if you really want to be a free person, that is what it takes. I wouldn't change a thing. I dread the thought of working for someone EVER AGAIN......

[EHowe]

I think it would be hilarious to see Bryan make a similar video of what it is really like. I remember my first conversation with VDH customer service. Not only was I new to doublehose regs I was also a brand new diver. I could hear the eyes rolling through the phone . But, to his credit as hard as it must have been for him, he kept his cool and answered all my questions and made a loyal customer out of me. I'm sure he gets THOSE kind of calls all the time

[ScubaLawyer]

Patience with the lowest common denominator customer in any business is the key to happy patrons. It's not that folks are lacking intelligence, it's just that with diving, flying or any other activity, there is a learning curve as to the lingo, equipment and skills necessary. For example, when I was beginning flight training I didn't know the difference between density altitude and my ass. I asked a bunch of what I now know were really dumb questions I should have known the answer to from the written material. My instructor was very patient with me. My very first dive student ever way back when pulled me aside and, with all seriousness, said, "Ok, I get the part about the regulator mouthpiece going in your mouth and breathing with it, but what keeps water from going up your nose if you accidentally breathe in with your nose?" I politely told her not to worry as we would cover that very important topic in Chapter 1 and before we got in the pool with mask, snorkel and fins. She seemed really relieved. Mark

[Bryan]

If I made a commercial like the Wells Fargo one I'm afraid it would come with at least an R rating for language alone....But it would be funny I'll bet.

I hate to talk on the phone because 99% of the time it catches me off guard and stops me in the middle of working on something. I much prefer E-mail as it allows me time to think about the reply and give more info if necessary.
My favorite phone calls go something like this....

Hey Bro, This is Brick Mantooth here at super secret squirrel commando base, I'm Navy SEAL #1, Delta Force, Joe Johnny Bad Ass SOCOM leader of the free world and you need to send me 20 of those Kra-Kens so I can outfit my whole team with them....I know more about diving than a stupid little puke like you ever will so just hurry up and send them. I'll need a 90% military discount and overnight shipping plus 20 years of spare parts cause double hose regulators are not bullet proof and my team gets shot up a lot.

No problem, I can do that. I just need your command information and purchase order so I can run it through SAM and get a CAGE code verification for it.

Hey Bro I don't have time for your twinkle toe commie bullshit. The destiny of the free world is at stake here......I can't give you that info or I'd have to kill you.

CLICK.....Phone number put on SPAM reject for future calls.

Yea.....I'm gonna need a rebuild kit for a DA Aqua-Master serial # xxxxxxxx It's the first one that Cos-Toe made so be sure you get the serial number correct as this is the most valuable regulator in the world.

No problem, you can order on line and I'll ship it right away.

Yea.....Well when I get it I'll call you up and you can tell me how to install it.

Sorry, I get paid to do that but all the service information is available on the website.

CLICK.....Phone number put on SPAM reject for future calls.

Yea do you have stuff for double hose regulators?

I have hundreds of parts for double hose regulators and have them listed by category in the website store. You can view and order on line 24/7.

Yea....I don't use that innerweb so just tell me all the parts you have and I'll tell you what I want and you send it to me and I'll send you a check.

I'm sorry but it does not work that way.

Well I guess I can't order anything if you don't tell me what you have.

Perhaps you know a 10yr old that could help you with the innerweb as that's the only way I sell things.

With calls like this I expect at least 3 or 4 from the same person on the same subject before an order ever gets here but eventually it does.

Hello I'm Scuba Steve and I have an on line magazine where I review SCUBA gear. I need you to send me one of those Kra-Kens and I'll evaluate it and let you know if it's any good or not.

What experience/background do you have with double hose regulators?

Well I know they breathe like crap and have no idea why anyone would be stupid enough to dive with a two hose death trap. My instructor Harry Hairchest said they were crap back in the day and he used to run 50 miles with one and a set of doubles before he dove on the Doria but I think he might have exaggerated a bit but I promise I'll give you a fair review if I like it.

MMMMMM NO......Phone number put on SPAM for future calls.

Yea, who make the Kra-Ken

I'm sorry but all that info is proprietary and I don't share it.

Well could you tell me who makes XXXXX part at least so I can have some made up.

Once again that is proprietary information and I can't share it.

Ok I want orange hoses so can you make me 2 sets.....That's 4 hoses total

I'll be glad to do that but you will have to buy a minimum of 300 hoses. It will run you about 5k to get started plus a custom color charge and shipping cost plus there will be charge to use my molds. Just a wild guess I would bet your final cost would be around 8k

RIP OFF......I don't have that kind of money for 2 sets of hoses....That's 4 hoses total you know.......

Sorry I couldn't help you...CLICK.....Phone number put on SPAM for future calls.

The above are actual phone calls I have taken and on more than one occasion I'm sorry to say.......

Don't get me wrong......If someone has a legitimate question and wants information I'm glad to help, that's what I'm here for.......If you call me and want to tell me what YOU know it will be a very short conversation.

Never a dull moment here at VDH!

[SurfLung]

"Perhaps you know a 10yr old that could help you with the innerweb as that's the only way I sell things."

I think THAT one was my buddy Rich... He actually told me that you told him to find a 10 year old to help him order! Ha! That cracked me up. Sea Hunt Jerry calls him "50,001 Questions Rich"... And that's not far from the truth! We were teasing him about that up at Fortune Pond last weekend. I think the next call you're going to get is about ordering a Phoenix. Rich has been getting the double hose fever worse and worse... Latest project is making a Twin 50s aluminum set-up to use his ScubaPro BCD. He ordered a USD manifold off Ebay and then ordered modern tanks bands... Which turned out to be a mistake because the modern bands position the centers for a modern manifold. Well, the vintage manifold hex nut was interfering with his 3-port BCD inflator swivel that uses the hookah port of his DAAM. The current solution is to use my solid manifold and USD tank bands. But, he's been thinking about the Phoenix so that he can get his HP and LP ports set up without interference on the hex nuts of the other manifold. He asked me if the Phoenix would solve that and I thought... "Here we go again..." Ha! Ha!

[Bryan]

I wish your friend Rich was the only one with innerweb phobia!
It is a conversation I have weekly and surprisingly my suggestion of consulting a 10yr old works in many cases

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